Tag Archives: Love

Embracing Positivity After Loss: My Journey

30 Sunday Nov 2025

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So it’s been a while since I’ve had something positive to say! Like my Bigma said, “If you ain’t got nothing good to say, don’t say nothing at all!” I went with the “don’t say nothing at all part”. Why? There was so much grief in my life. As soon as I thought I was back to me, another loss happened. That last one took some of my soul away! Why? It wasn’t just the loss. It was everything that came with it. I had to recover, readjust, realign, and release all those things! I’ve done all of that. Now I can remember who I am. I know whose I am and understand the purpose GOD has for my life. It’s not about dwelling on the negative. It’s about promoting and embracing the positives. This will make me better and everyone linked to me. So I’m back for the better!

I spent the Thanksgiving holiday with my middle son, Tyrell, his wife, Lanie, and my grandbabies, Charlie and Alex. My other Grandbaby, Halana, also came over, and she even cooked some of the food! That’s growing up! Ty was my sous chef, and he learned some of the recipes that were handed down through the generations. Christina was in NJ with her new Fiancé! Oh yeah, a lot has happened since I’ve been gone. She met the love of her life, and he put that ring on it. LOL I’ll write about it soon. RC was working as usual and didn’t make it. But that’s another story for later. What was important was that I was THANKFUL! I was truly happy spending almost 6 days at the house with the grands, and I didn’t even leave! Enjoying genuine love from the seeds that I created. Waking up every morning to Grandmaaaaaa was heart-warming, and I loved every minute of it. There were so many tasks on my list. I needed to do them, but they didn’t get done. I know I’ll be very busy once I’m back in Florida, trying to get caught up!

This is what brought me back to myself! GOD put us here for a reason. We never know what our purpose is, and if we do discover it, that’s a blessing. I’m still not sure about mine. All I know is that I love my kids, my grandkids, and life, and all that it has to offer. Many people I had to cut off in life. They weren’t making life better. Instead, they caused grief and pain. Once you reach a certain age, your circle gets so small that you can count it on one hand. In my life, I have done so much for so many people and never gotten anything in return. Not that I was ever looking for something, but respect, and they don’t even give you that. But I gladly cut off my losses. When someone looks back and sees all the things I’ve done, it feels good. It validates my effort to make their life better. It shows that I did ok. But when I can’t see a thing they provided to my life, it’s a sign. It’s time to move on without them. (Take that as a lesson) It’s okay to walk away from what or who doesn’t deserve you in their life. God will replace them so fast, you won’t even miss them!

This week has shown me an important lesson. Life is to be lived with the most important people in your life. It is to be shared with them too. As I age gracefully, I have no intentions of dealing with anything or anyone that brings stress to my life. Being over 60 means every morning, your cup is full. You drink it till it’s empty. Then you fill it up again tomorrow because you may not have as many tomorrows as you had yesterday! So I fill my cup with love and laughter. It overflows with happiness. I fill it with the people who make my day better than it was yesterday. I’m back to me, and with more of me, I can give more to you! So look for me to spread all this love I still have to the ones that deserve it! Let me enjoy this holiday season with all this love I have to share!

The “Real Mommie Teresa”

Always and Forever

24 Saturday Feb 2024

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Hi, y’all, I know it’s been a while since I’ve blogged, and I feel I have so much to say, that I haven’t said it yet. I looked at my blog, and I could see my life digressed when it actually progressed. It’s almost like I wrote the least when I needed to write the most. I let depression and loneliness manifest inside of me instead of writing and releasing it. My thoughts all lived in my heart and my head, but I didn’t let them escape. Maybe it’s time to let them escape so I can keep life moving forward. When you lose something so close to you, it takes so much out of you. It drains love from the heart, but blood still runs strong through the heart, which reminds you that there’s still so much blood and love left to give. But it also limits who you share it with because you don’t want that pain again, and you have to protect the peace you have at all costs. You get a sense of peace for the loved ones gone, and you have to be careful who you let into your space that can take that peace you found away.

While doing my Saturday morning chores and listening to my old-school music, I now listen more to words, than music, and understand what we missed back in the day by listening, but not really hearing. Always and Forever by Heatwave came on, and I just stopped and listened; these are the lyrics:

Always and forever, each moment with you

It is just like a dream to me that somehow came true

And I know tomorrow will still be the same

‘Cause we’ve got a life of love that won’t ever change and

Everyday, love me your own special way

Melt all my heart away with a smile

Take time to tell me, you really care

And we’ll share tomorrow, together

I’ll always love you forever, forever

There’ll always be sunshine when I look at you

It’s something I can’t explain, just the things that you do

And if you get lonely, phone me and take

A second to give to me that magic you make and

Everyday, love me your own special way

Melt all my heart away with a smile

Take time to tell me, you really care

And we’ll share tomorrow, together

I’ll always love you ever, ever

Always forever love you

Always forever love you

Always forever love you

Always forever love you

This took me backward and forward at the same time. Always and forever is the love I shared with the people closest to me that I lost. Always and forever, they will be with me, the dreams I had with them, and for them will last always and forever. When I always thought tomorrow would be different, I realized tomorrow would be the same because, with a life of love, it won’t ever change. It’ll change because they aren’t there in the flesh, but they are always there in the spirit. There will always be sunshine when I look at you.. and they show themselves in the clouds with the sun. My heart still melts with the smiles they left me, always and forever will be the same. I thank GOD for the signs that HE shows me to make me feel better. I lost, I loved, and I will always love. I have to choose who to give my love to because each loss breaks the heart a little, but the love you put back strengthens it every time. Now it’s funny as I finish this blog, Luther Vandross comes on saying, ‘It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright now.” I take this also as a sign. To get back to blogging and releasing. Someone else needs what I share, they are going through or know what I’ve experienced. Writing makes me happy, so now I focus on happiness and recovery. The mask is slowly coming off and always and forever life improves.

See ya soon,

The Real Mommie Teresa

And Life Goes On..Without Daddy

25 Tuesday Sep 2018

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IMG_0273It’s been a minute since I’ve blogged and a lot of changes have happened in my life.  So many that it’ll take lots of blogs to blog about!! LOL.. Well the most significant change in my life was the loss of my Father.  As you all that follow me know, my Daddy was sick for quite a few years.  He was diabetic, on dialysis, and had congestive heart failure which ultimately lead to his transition on Nov. 3rd of 2017.  That day was one of the most confusing days of my life.  You know we always think we are “prepared” for death, especially when someone is sick, and they have told you that they are ready to go.  Well it’s easier said than done.  I haven’t shared this story, but as a part of my healing, I have to let go of a few things…

That day.. I had been with Daddy at the hospital all week, sleeping on the couch and he was acting out, “as he did” with the nurses. But he was in a different space this time.  He went back to his younger days.  He flirted, he talked junk, he even tried to dance a few times.  And while they call me the “Paparazzi” I was capturing ALL those moments on video, not knowing they would be the last moments of laughter.  Well Daddy ended up getting an infection and I had to sleep in the gown and mask, and all the covering, for his protection.  I did it for one night, and woke up looking like I could peel it off from sweating like crazy in it!! Well the next day, Daddy told me to go to my Son’s house and sleep, and just come back that morning instead of sleeping in that gown.  Crazy how he asked me to leave after I had been there like 5 nights.. Well I left and we got that call about 4am, saying he had went into cardiac arrest during the night, and he was now in ICU and we needed to get there.

Well we got there.. Me, my sister, and the immediate family.  There Doctors words.. I’ll never forget.. “We have 413 patients in this hospital and Mr. Crawford is the sickest one here.  He needs surgery on his heart to survive, but because of all his other chronic health problems, he may not survive the surgery.  You all need to make a decision asap, like before I leave the room whether we do surgery, or we just keep him comfortable.”  And just like that, we had to let go of the man who had taken care of us for all of our lives. We had to keep comfortable the man who raised 4 children after our Mom died and  did what he “knew” how to do.  As a Widowed Dad, he had his challenges, but he did all he knew to do, to make sure we had what we needed.  Then you have these words, keep him comfortable, which means, give him meds and let him die without pain. (in real talk).

That hit us like a ton of bricks in our chest.  We already knew what Daddy told us, and the decision was pretty much already known, but just speaking it was like casting a death sentence we didn’t want to do.  But we had to do it.  Then I spent time with Daddy and let him know we mad the decision.  He wasn’t coherent, but I know he heard me. I had that long talk with him and said my Goodbye before we did anything,  We all had our time with him to say what we needed to say.

Then came the moment… that moment when we all gathered together before they started shutting off the machines.  I told him, how proud we were of him, and how he had been a great Dad, and had raised amazing children, and how much we loved him.  I told him that we would be ok.  All of a sudden, the machines started beeping and making sounds and going crazy!!! I thought the nurses had turned them off, but they said they hadn’t touched the machines.  They said he could hear me and he was releasing his life and that’s what was happening.  Well after we all said our final goodbyes, the Chaplain asked if he could say a prayer, and he said the 23rd Psalm.  I put my hand on Daddy’s heart, and the Chaplain put his hand over my hand. The Chaplain said the 23rd Psalm, and when he finished, I said, may GOD bless your soul Daddy.  Then the nurse walked in immediately and said, his heart just stopped.  And just like that.. HE- WAS- GONE.IMG_0268

The look of peace was on his face, and the breathing machine was still on, so it seemed as if he was still breathing.  He wasn’t cold, but he was peaceful.  He had been so sick and now it was all over.  As I write this and the tears roll, I know that he’s saying it’s ok, because I was tired.  He did what he was sent here to do, and his job was over.

Life is a job.  GOD puts us here for a purpose, and once we fulfill the purpose HE has for us, then HE brings us back to HIM.  No death is easy on who you leave behind, but it’s the ultimate trip for the one who’s leaving.  The way to even feel better is to think of the life they are now living pain-free with the ancestors, who are watching over you, and waiting for you to complete your task and join them.

Welcome back to “my blogs” and thanks for being a part of the “The Real Mommie Teresa”.  There’s so much more to come and so much I have to share. Please stay tuned, and I love you all with all that’s in me, like a real Mommie..

Love and Hugs,

The Real Mommie Teresa

“I Can’t Breathe”

25 Sunday Sep 2016

Posted by in Babies, Death, Faith, Fathers, Happy, Life, mothers, Mothers, Uncategorized, Uplifting

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As I sat on the couch and watched my Dad in the hospital, with the oxygen in his nose, he would take these deep breaths, then he would pause before he would breath again. I would sit there and watch him, just to make sure he could breath. As I watched him, and I watched tv with all the protests in Charlotte, all I could think about was the phrase, “I can’t breath”. When it weights this heavy on my mind, I have to write.

“I can’t breathe”.. The 1st time was when my Dad told me my Mom died. I remember taking that deep breath in, and not letting one out…

“I can’t breath”… When I saw my Mom in the coffin and the glass covering her whole body..

“I can’t breathe”… When my Grandmother was dying with cancer and on her way to the hospital she said, this was going to be her last trip to the hospital because she knew she’d never come home again.

“I can’t breathe”.. When I found out RC had died in surgery from a car accident and my 1st born child would never get to see his father.

“I can’t breathe”.. When Jr. didn’t wake up and Nita told me to get home as soon as I can because my Brother had died.

You get my point? I can breathe never ends up with something good. Then I think about when a parent has to see their child gunned down in the streets. Not by a police, but by ANYONE!! I think about the wives who witness the murder of their husbands, I think about the men who are only trying to protect their families, or the women who are trying to protect their families. When you can’t breath, your chest hurts, your eyes fill with water, and you don’t know whether to run or be still, but it all hurts!

I can’t breath when I think about the injustice of society. I can’t breath when I think about how we’ve worked so hard to get to where we can all get along and “society” can rip us apart like paper. I can’t breath when we as MOMS have to bury our children too soon for nothing. I can’t breathe when I see racist hate because of the color of someone’s skin!  Not breathing hurts.!! The only cure for not breathing, is breathing! I pray for everyone to be able to breathe. Not breathing is a natural part of life that was made to take your breath away and it already hurts, but the unnecessary “I can’t breathe” has to stop. And once I finished writing this blog, my updated iWatch said “BREATHE’! So it’s also taking 1 minute for you to just take time from you day to breathe. How ironic. Look at your life, look at the people in your life. Look at who’s worth your breath, and those are the people that you fight for! Don’t settle for the injustice.  We’ve come to far to turn back now.  Breathe!

Love and Hugs,

The Real Mommie Teresa

 

 

 

What is “Your” Purpose?

11 Monday Jul 2016

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Lately I’ve had to ask myself over and over again.. what is my dream for me? And I can’t seem to come up with an answer.  Does anyone else feel that way?  Do you all realize that our dreams were for our children?  Our dreams were for the future of our children and we never made dreams for ourselves.  My whole life revolved around making their dreams come true.  Not once did I ever dream of what I wanted.  Now that I’m in a position to truly try to live my dreams, I don’t know what they are.  The dreams that I had, aren’t as meaningful now because the kids are adults, and the things I wished for them, are almost complete.  So now I’m on a “make a dream list” for me.  And I think you all should think of that too.  Think of what it is you would dream of for yourself.  Write it down, and then you’ll have a goal to work toward.  We have to live life for more than working for the pleasure of others.  I know I’m a fine one to talk, because that’s what makes me happy, but it doesn’t complete me.  So all my Baby Boomers.. we are over the 50 mark, and we have to live out our dreams now!  What’s your dream?

Love and Hugs,

“The Real Mommie Teresa”

My Dream Come True

27 Sunday Dec 2015

Posted by in Babies, Faith, Uncategorized, Uplifting

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  As a little girl at 13 years old, yes little girl. (Back then 13 you were still a little girl!!) I remember standing over my Mothers white casket, it had glass on top of it, and it showed her whole body. Almost like sleeping beauty. She had on a long white dress, pearl nail polish, and satin white shoes. Her hair was pulled back and her makeup was done flawless by my Aunt Flossie. She didn’t look dead. She looked sleep and she looked so at peace. She was beautiful. Not only was she beautiful dead, she was beautiful alive. She was the prettiest woman I ever knew. The love I had for her was an indescribable love. It was almost like a fairy tale love. You know the love that only comes once in a lifetime?  Well you can imagine how devistated I was when I saw that casket close, and watched them lower it into the ground and cover it with dirt. The absolute worst, most horrific day of my life! The pain was unbearable and I knew I had lost one thing I would never, ever get back in this life!! All I had was memories, and dreams of how we were, and who she was. I had lost my Best Friend! I prayed a lot. I missed all the Mom stuff growing up. I missed the love, the support, the talks, and the just being Mom. All the things I ever dreamed of, I missed.  

Years later after being a Mom of 2 amazing sons, I went to the doctor for a checkup and a refill on my birth control pills. And to my dismay, the doctor said I was pregnant!! Like almost 7 months!! Had no idea! No missed periods, no weight gain, nothing!!!!  I did NOT want anymore children. But now I was expecting a third, and then I found out it was a girl!  What a blessing. God protected that baby to make sure she got here!  Well that little girl was born and she carried a portion of my Mothers name. As a matter of fact, she looked like my Mom. She was perfect!  Then all the love I had inside from a Mother/Daughter prospective flood out into her. I gave her everything I missed with my Mom. She was my daughter, and she was my best friend. 

But not until she grew up, and a day like today, do I really understand who she is. She is my dream, except I’m the Mother and she’s me. She’s the me that wanted to take care of my Mother. She’s the me that was amazing and traveled and told the amazing stories.  She’s the me that sent beautiful gifts, and never let me feel unloved!  She’s giving me what I would have given to my Mom. I understand God’s purpose more today than I did when I was 13. I lost it all! But I was faithful and humble, and He gave it back to me. So God gave me a dream in you Christina. He is in you “Christ-Ina” and I never realized that until today.  I read every page of the book you sent me, and every page brought a joyful tear.  Because it’s so us!! We can see something and immediately laugh because we’re thinking the same thing…I can call you and you’ll be dialing me… I’ll be cramping and call you and you’re cramping..you share all your joys with me and I share mine with you. 

So today, this is for you. You are my Dream. You are the person that completed my life cycle. You are the gift God gave me back for my Mother, and I love you soooooo much. There are not enough words to tell you what you mean to me, and how you healed so much hurt that was in my heart. All I can say is “Christina, thank you for loving me” and “thank you God for loving me enough to make my dreams come true by giving me a chance to really know, A Mother’s Love through a daughter!!

And by all means, I love my boys!! My Men..My protectors!! They are all of that!! They make sure me and Christina are ok all the time and they are also my gifts!! However, this was about a little girl who lost her Mother. 

“Hugs, love & joyful tears”

The Real Mommie Teresa 


 

A Happy Place

08 Tuesday Dec 2015

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  Have you ever been at a point in life where you feel like life is just great? It’s funny when you’re happy, and people can see the happiness in you. When you lose your joy, it shows in everything you do. The way you talk, walk, dress, and act toward other people.  When you’re not happy, you attract people to you who are in a place where you are. When you’re in a happy place, you attract happy people. It’s strange how that works out, and how the body can show emotions. People want to be around someone who has really good vibes and are emotionally stable. So I challenge you to take a few pictures of yourself on a day you are really happy, then look back at a day you weren’t happy and see if you can see the happiness radiate from within yourself. 

God gave us all an internal light to shine so others can see it. It draws people to you. It lets them know, you’re one of the chosen ones, and God has you. So find your light and let it shine. When you find your happy place, no one and nothing can really steal your joy. God has you and He has control.  I have the attitude of “won’t He do it”!  And I ain’t going to let no one steal my joy! 

Today I pledge, I’m done with drama. If it doesn’t make ME happy, I’m not draining my emotions. The feelings of happiness gives you energy. It doesn’t drain you. If it’s takes negative energy…lose me with it!! 😁.  Being happy is too easy. There’s a simple solution. If it doesn’t make you happy.. Let it go.  See if your happiness returns. If it does, then that problem was stealing your joy. 

Hugs and love,

The Real Mother Teresa

Don’t Give Santa All Your Money..

02 Wednesday Dec 2015

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Santa WalletWell it’s that time of year again.  Time for the parents to go broke to get the kids all these toys that they want from the TV commercials! Well I’ve been through that over 25 times (until they finished college) and I have some advice that could save you lots of money and heartache dealing with the children.  If your kids are adults, you’ll understand!

First of all, the kids need a limit of toys.  I know we want them to have more than what we had, but really.. we had maybe 2 toys!  So 3 toys would be more than what we had!  If you tell your kids they can get 5 toys, then you’ll see what’s really important to them.  That’s what you focus on.  Anything else would be a bonus.  How many times have they opened a gift and played with it once.  But stayed on the playstation for 10 days!  Not looking at anything else.  Stop wasting money on all those little things they don’t care about.  It’s more for the parents than the kids.

Be honest with them if your funds can’t get everything they want.  I know a lot of parents struggle everyday.  And you wonder how you will get the kids the gifts they want.  Kids ask for it because they think you can afford it!  If you be honest with your kids before Christmas and let them know that you can’t afford certain items, (if you raised them right) they will understand and their expectations won’t be so big.  Then if you are able to get more, its a bonus.  I remember one year I really couldn’t afford to get them  a  lot, but they ALWAYS had great Christmases.  They were incredibly understanding which blew me away.  But after Christmas, once bills were paid, I splurged on them, because they understood.

In short, Christmas has been commercialized and marketed to make kids think its about the toys and the gifts when it’s really not.  It’s about the birth of our Lord and Savior.  It’s about giving to the needy, and it’s about rejoicing.  If your kids seem ungrateful, take them to any homeless shelter and let them see how excited those kids are who only get one toy!  We as parents are the culprits. We are the ones who spoil our kids with “things” and they don’t get the true meaning until the “things” aren’t involved.  So this year, don’t go broke on one day.  Babies won’t even know it’s Christmas new Moms.  They already have lots of toys they never play with.  lol.. But I know it’s hard to not buy them everything.  But that’s for you.. not them, because they don’t know.

Cherish the day, and let the kids know the true meaning of Christmas.  And if you can do something for a child who has nothing, ask your child to give away one toy to a child who won’t get anything. They will certainly understand the true meaning and the value of Christmas if they do.

Hugs & Kisses

The Real Mommie Teresa

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Everything ain’t for Everybody

25 Sunday Jan 2015

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As I look at Social Media and see everyone posti2015/01/img_4651.pngng their accomplishment, certificates, lifestyles, trips, homes, cars, beautiful children, wonderful marriages, and successful businesses, a sense of happiness fulfills me, and there’s a little voice inside me saying, “they did that!” Even if I don’t know that person, I still click on that like button because in life, I love to see people live their lives and succeed.  It means that they’ve been thru that storm, and they made it out!! But on the other hand, you get the other people that ain’t happy about anyone doing anything!  They don’t like what you’re doing, they’re jealous about what other people have, and they have that misery in their life that doesn’t allow them to be happy.  Guess what? Eveythang ain’t for everybody.  They still have that storm to go thru before they get to their rainbow.  Realize that in order to get thru the storm, you may need to see what’s on the other side of the storm. You may need to have a goal to reach.  You may need to see what it looks like from an airplane flying over the Swiss Alps, or what a S63 Mercedes Benz looks like, or what a designer loft looks like, or what name brand perfume you can buy, or what nice restaurants you can go to for dinner, or what island you can’t wait to get to!  Don’t look at someone’s accomplishments and hate on them, look at them and increase you dreams!! YOU can have ANYTHANG, yes anythang, your heart desires, but it takes WORK!  Ain’t nobody giving you nothing you don’t deserve!  So instead of not being happy for someone, send them a message and ask them, what did you do to get there? What can I do? Tell me about that, and congratulate them!  They did it and so can you! If it ain’t your time yet..Rush your time to get here!  Only YOU can make that happen!  How do I know?? Maannn, if y’all only knew my story, you’d understand!

Love & Hugs

“The Real Mommie Teresa”

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Always Take Time to Laugh…

24 Saturday Jan 2015

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This world is mean, cruel, busy, stressful and crazy!! If you let life suck you into its trap, you’ll be in a state of misery forever!! Every day consist of 24 hours. Then it starts all over. If you don’t get it right in 24 hours, guess what? It comes back the next day!! Laugh at your failures because you have a chance to do it again!! Laugh at your success because you finally got it right!! Life is fun, loving, compassionate, and daring. Life is made to live it, love it, and laugh through the good and bad times!! Laugh a little!
Hugs & Love
“The Real Mommie Teresa”

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